Protoject's journal

[protoject]

For a while now I've been out of commission and wasting away on this diet. In the beginning I experienced an increase in strength and I noticed other improvements like with my vision and certain mental variables [depression and other things going away]. One week I just got really sick, I 've been going through fevers for the past weeks as well as a lot of weakness. Bubbles came up in my joints and my bones have been fucked [for example, something happened with my spine and it is making me feel debilitated while a nerve is getting pinched. I thought it was vitamin a toxicity at first but I doubt it and it might be just a part of the catabolism of detox]. There were periods of increased strength. There was also a period where I finally gained weight that I've been trying to gain and it maintained pretty well- between 125 and 130, which I havent been at in years. Right now I'm only 120 and I've been incredibly weak for the past week. I just cant do anything except lay down and sleep. For some reason I kept trying to stay up but I realized that I should give in and sleep because my body needs to recuperate. A problem came up recently, too, where I've been eating junk food (slushies from the convenience store, I've eaten candies at times, and I ate candy-like breakfast foods today).

I'm thinking that what I need to do is to be able to rest and go through the detox period, and find a circumstance where I can do this, because I don't believe my family will accomodate me for much longer. I need to eat the good foods, like steak, bone marrow and liver, and perhaps some fruit and vegetables...  and then, when I feel a detox in process I need to allow myself to rest and sleep, because I cannot do otherwise. I should also not force myself to eat, instead I should do a bit of fasting during periods where my body is accomodating the new raw animal fats/other nutrients and doing a detox.

[TylerDurden]

What are you eating exactly, each week?

[Raw Kyle]

That reads rough. I hope you figure out something that works long term.

[protoject]

Thanks Kyle. I think I will. I am also very hopeful.

Tyler, I picked up a grocery load on Friday to feed me for about 4 days. I picked up [all beef] shoulder steaks, liver, and marrow bones. I decided that for those "impulsive eating" moments I should pick up fruits and vegetables [and I just likem anyway], so I bought oranges, limes, plums, raspberries, avacados and tomatoes.
I just want to let you guys know that I did grow up eating the crappiest food, and over the past few years doing a lot of dietary transitioning I have learned to eat only healthy foods and it has become a lot easier for me. There are  times when I just relapse for some reason or another. My mind is incredibly scatty and I lose track of things and sometimes it's like I can't manage 'how' to do what I need to do. But once I slip into the habit that gets around it, that fits with what I'm wanting to do, it's a lot easier.

I think a lot of my problems with feeling really crappy has something to do with my body switching over from sugar/carbs. I do not know much scientifically but I have had vegetarian and fruitarian stints that went on for quite a while and I don't think I had anything to really transport these sugars from my body [nor really a way for my body to USE them!], so what happens to them? I've mostly urinated clear before, especially if I eat a lot of fruit/sugar, and when I started eating raw fats I urinate yellow instead. Also, I know at some point in the past my experience with sugars changed.. the usual highs and lows associated with them just went to a whole different level. It's like someone who uses drugs so much that the high and low isn't really there anymore on the same level but the drug is still needed. Know what I mean? When I started eating fats again it's like those sugar highs and lows became more noticable like they were before everything went out of wack on such a high level.

I ran out of most of my fruit and vegetables now and I think it will do me good to wean off the fruit for now, lessen the intake. For some reason I do think I should continue eating avocados. But yea, I think any eating impulses comes from something happening with my sugar levels, and a sugar addiction. It's a very neurotic feeling and I find that it "flushes out" after the raw fats get a chance to settle in. [The blood returns to my face!]

Does that make sense to you guys, any related experience?

Edit: BTW... out of those foods I buy, the shoulder steak is organic as well as the fruits and veggies. The liver and bone marrow is not organic. I have been contacting some shops in Toronto and did make an order for organics and I hope it'll make a difference. I also know that the place I made an order for the organics with sells organic everything else and they also have grass fed beef which I was glad to hear so I hope to be buying some of that.