just wanted to update this thread...
first off, gs - thank you so much for this post, it compelled me to try. and to all of you who replied, i was able to make what i feel are somewhat "educated" decisions about trying something new. i did buy some live oysters, and i'm so glad i did! delicious! wonderful! can't wait to do it again! i didn't have an oyster knife, and didn't really need to...
washed the oysters off real good (ya, they were a little cruddy... btw, i imagine if you bought them cleaned already, you'd be paying more for them...). i then placed them in some cold fresh water to "soak" for less than 10 minutes. the oysters ended up opening slightly on their own, perhaps they were gasping for saltwater??? but it did allow me to sneak a large, somewhat flat, stainless spoon between the halves to coerce them open (inserted spoon while submerged. when i took them out of the water, they closed again). no broken shells or bits. once open, the spoon seemed to "scoop" the oyster out with minimal effort. trying to remove the first one from the shell by hand, just mangled the poor little fella... but i ate him anyway! rinsed the "meat" off with running cold water, and didn't experience anything bitter or overly salty. no need for vinegar, or lemon juice with these guys, they were just good!
some replies here got me to pick up some fresh, unfrozen clams, too. treated them the same, but they didn't open when submerged. a gentle rap with a small hammer was enough to break the shell, mostly into manageable size pieces. again, a (smaller) spoon scooped out the clam with minimal effort, rinsed them under running water (to remove the few smaller chips that occurred during the rap with the hammer), and i soon had seven whole, unmangled clam buddies on a plate. didn't find them to be bitter, overly salty, or in need of lemon or vinegar... they were tasty, too!
perhaps it was rinsing, or maybe my attitude, but this went so well for me, i can't wait to try again!
as for the fresh, unfrozen sea scallops i got (it was a day full of new attempts!)... the flavor was fine, but the texture was too soft and gooey for my liking. used to eat these cooked in butter, and they were far more appealing in a more "firm" condition. i don't know if i'll buy these again, but i'm willing to try the smaller bay scallops to make sure. i'm hoping they are of a different consistency, because i really do miss the cooked versions of scallops, they were a treat when growing up! yum yum!
in the same way i truly appreciated this thread, i hope others find this additional info useful!
thanks again, everyone!
p.s. currently living on the gulf, and even after the bp oil debacle (still makes me sick to my stomach to think about that...) these items, if they were "fresh" from this area, didn't make me sick... the claim about gulf seafood being "unsafe" may be somewhat unfounded? time will tell...