The social side of you?

[goodsamaritan]

Tough issue when you are young with peers.

I just tell people I used to be really fat and sick and this works for me so they let me be.

[djr_81]

When I told him about the (what I thought was cute) acronym, SAD, he got pissed off. Thought that it was elitist. That "Americans must be sad because they're eating disgusting SAD food." When I told my father and aunt, whom I tend to look for the most guidance, they thought it was cute and amusing as well. To quote my dad, "It IS sad!" I still don't understand why he hates the SAD acronym. He was absolutely fine with SMD.

It's better than that. SAD depresses the body which truly does make people sadder. One of the most common benefits I've seen touted by people eating raw meat and especially raw fat is an increase in mood. When you're not dealing with a constant barrage of damaged food you develop a feeling of well being and for lack of a better term happiness.

[Ioanna]

Finding a woman on RPD to be a potential mother is pretty steep.  It would be easier to find a woman on cooked meat paleo diet.  The raw part can be negotiated later on.

I would think that if she's cooked paleo, raw would be a natural inclination too.

I agree with Wodgina and Guittarman about it being easier to accept a non-RPD if I were sure I did not want kids, and feel it selfish to have any with a non-RPD just to have them.  

My parents know I eat meat, just not how I eat it, yet still, both have made comments about being sure to cook it properly.  This makes me feel that if I told anyone how I eat they would think I am eating dangerously for health.  How can I carry the child of someone who thinks the way I am eating is dangerous for me, let alone a developing person inside??  and then issues on how to raise a child... cooked chicken, berries, veg, seared meats might be as far as I can go, while he would not understand the unsuitability of 'rewarding' a day or behavior or football game with... who knows what?!?

Even before RPD my mom was against bringing processed food into the house... everything was homemade, as much came from the garden as possible which included all kinds of berries and veg, we did not eat dessert except on special occasion (e.g. birthday) and that was homemade too, and we hardly ever ate out of the house (cultural thing for me) except on very special occasion that we would go to a nice restaurant (eg engagement party or something).  I've never had a boxed cereal, wonder bread, pop tart, twinkie, hostess anything, etc. so I always found this kind of 'food' a turn-off, but I never just how unhealthy it is.  Now it is simply unacceptable, I cannot tolerate it... I see what people at work eat in the break-room... that is their norm everyday... my way sounds so strict/limited/boring to the average person here.  I one time refused a piece of cake more than 5 times from the same person before I gave in to say that I am gluten-intolerant... then it was okay not to be eating cake while carrying on with the socialization.  And then EVERYONE wants to know if not cake, what do I eat.  My answer is obviously not acceptable as this question comes up again and again and again by the same people over and over and over... but what do you eat??  It gets old!, and I feel uncomfortable with that kind of attention though I hope it does not show.

Another date tonight... he is perfectly nice... all I could smell was a bunch of chemicals!    Laundry fabric softeners, soaps, colognes... too much!  

[jessica]

ioanna

it seems that you just happen be surrounded at work with a bunch of unhealthy people and the fact that your family doesnt seem as though they would accept your diet as it is probably compounds the feeling that everyone is like that.  there are people who would be more accepting of this, as well as less chemical ridden in general!  i do no know what part of the country you are in or what your hobbies are but there are parts of the country in general where people are more open minded and foward thinking about these kind of things, although i am not suggesting you move! i think it would be beneficial to find places in your town to connect with people who are more in tune with how you live

as for how you grew up, mine was somewhat similar and it makes me extremely thankful! although, before i knew the consequences, i was allowed to partake in packaged foods, i would have rather not so i am a bit jealous!

[jessica]

whoa extralizard i just read you post
i dont want to be rude but your boyfriend sounds pretty immature and insecure!  if he werent he would have no need to be so controlling and to keep you subserviant, do you see he is making decisions for you based on his own interest?  i hope you do what is best for your health regardless of college and boyfriend....i know you are on a food plan but do you know anyone who works in the cafeteria? i would totally hook up with one of them and see if they cant smuggle you raw eggs/fish/meat/veggie (hopefully they arent too poor quality) which you could prepare yourself, or atleast stick to a cooked paleo

its always amazing to me how intrinsically linked feating and dating/courting are.  i see the whole showing someone you can take care of them by providing food but its kind of gross to me that now-a-days people end up in a restaurant, generally filling themselves on poor quality food+chemicals prepared like narcotics to be as addictive as possible..just getting bloated on additives

there is a huge industry that has to do with making restaurant food contain just enough sweet, salty, fat and sugar to really play with insulin and satiety receptors to make the food narcotic!  also just the environment inside of restaurants is a planned barrage of smells to make you more hungry!  yuck

[Paleo Donk]

I've tried to get my gf to go raw paleo.  She's made some good changes like cutting down on the processed foods and cooking her steaks more rare, but she still doesn't take time to make lunch for work, instead eats whatever is available (processed foods).  After 2 years, that seems to be as far as she'll go. 

If I ever planned on having kids, I've decided that it has to be with someone who's been RP for at least a year prior to conception.  If I can't find her, then it's not worth it to have children.  Seems kind of selfish, having learned how important RPD is for proper health and development and then choose to have a child with a SADer just b/c I want kids.  I say better to hold out and hope to come across another RPDer.  Of course, being a guy I have a little more time for holding out than a girl.   

I'd like to be a father some day, even more so b/c of RPD, but every time I think about it, it's hard to see myself saying okay, I'm ready to spend the next 20-25 years devoting my life to this.  Guess I just gotta wait and see.  It'd probably be easier if I was with another RPDer.     

If your gf has gone as far as she can with respects to rpd and you won't want to conceive a child with someone who isnt a rpd for at least a year and add to this that you want to be a father then I think you need to think about ending the relationship. If you really are set with your ways then its not going to be fair to her at all staying with her. Why not save the time and look for someone you will be more compatible with?

There are plenty of women who will be willing to change their diet significantly towards raw paleo, you just have to find them.

[RawZi]

5 times from the same person before I gave in to say that I am gluten-intolerant... then it was okay not to be eating cake while carrying on with the socialization.  And then EVERYONE wants to know if not cake, what do I eat.  My answer is obviously not acceptable as this question comes up again and again and again by the same people over and over and over... but what do you eat??  It gets old!, and I feel uncomfortable with that kind of attention though I hope it does not show.

Another date tonight... he is perfectly nice... all I could smell was a bunch of chemicals!    Laundry fabric softeners, soaps, colognes... too much!  

    I've been through a work scene or two very much like that.  As a child too I had no interest in cake, and some people think that's sick.

    My husband uses totally SAD off the shelf hair products every day, SAD colognes, burns perfumy incense every day and buys scented cat litter.  I never had an indoor cat (nor a sick cat) before I met him.  I feel this is a major part of the reason I got sick.  I got him to agree now not to buy the cat litter again; because this time it affected both me and my son and we just can't take this package anymore.  I've never had an outdoor cat since I met him.  He would prefer them closed in one room, even our bedroom which is another story.  I don't see why a capable animal like a cat needs to be in a room, unless of course the room had mice.  He wants to help, but he's perfectly fine with commercialism in his own home and I can't be and be perfectly well at the same time so far.  I was very well ninety-seven percent of the time before I met him, but since it's a verbal fight for each step of what's healthy for me.  It's a challenge when people almost seem from different worlds, for lack of a better way to describe it.  I've never been a long term natural or artificial stimulant beverage drinker nor ever had chronic post nasal drip (once had dripping for nine days after eating a piece of bread).  Does one have to have stimulants or a different nasal set up to tolerate fabric softener, artificial scent and detergent?

[William]

I figure that since this is sort of a "How do I explain this to my loved one" type deal, I have some questions and a story.

If a person enjoys reading, getting him to read "We Want to Live" by Aajonus Vonderplanitz is maybe the best rawist propaganda.
If he can cope with science, then "Nutrition and Physical Degeneration" by Weston A. Price is the one - not all raw, but the best for showing the evil of bread.

[extralizard13]

whoa extralizard i just read you post
i dont want to be rude but your boyfriend sounds pretty immature and insecure!  if he werent he would have no need to be so controlling and to keep you subserviant, do you see he is making decisions for you based on his own interest?  i hope you do what is best for your health regardless of college and boyfriend....i know you are on a food plan but do you know anyone who works in the cafeteria? i would totally hook up with one of them and see if they cant smuggle you raw eggs/fish/meat/veggie (hopefully they arent too poor quality) which you could prepare yourself, or atleast stick to a cooked paleo

its always amazing to me how intrinsically linked feating and dating/courting are.  i see the whole showing someone you can take care of them by providing food but its kind of gross to me that now-a-days people end up in a restaurant, generally filling themselves on poor quality food+chemicals prepared like narcotics to be as addictive as possible..just getting bloated on additives

there is a huge industry that has to do with making restaurant food contain just enough sweet, salty, fat and sugar to really play with insulin and satiety receptors to make the food narcotic!  also just the environment inside of restaurants is a planned barrage of smells to make you more hungry!  yuck

It's fine, I think that's what shook me up a little, that he's being more immature than I'd thought.

With restaurants, I've definitely experienced that. Almost all the time, afterwards, we'd go home and sleep. Just yesterday, we went out, and I slept in the car on the way back. I couldn't stay awake. I've always felt like I needed to eat more too, even if I'm full. I usually can't eat a full restaurant dinner (excluding appetizers and dessert), either. So later on that night, I'll then pig out on the leftovers, and get a little fatter :/

[extralizard13]

If a person enjoys reading, getting him to read "We Want to Live" by Aajonus Vonderplanitz is maybe the best rawist propaganda.
If he can cope with science, then "Nutrition and Physical Degeneration" by Weston A. Price is the one - not all raw, but the best for showing the evil of bread.

I'll have to do so. (Ironically, about the bread, my step-brother is a professional baker. Way to support a family business XD )

[PaleoPhil]

...If I ever planned on having kids, I've decided that it has to be with someone who's been RP for at least a year prior to conception.  If I can't find her, then it's not worth it to have children.  Seems kind of selfish, having learned how important RPD is for proper health and development and then choose to have a child with a SADer just b/c I want kids.  I say better to hold out and hope to come across another RPDer.  ....

I'm with you, man. It would be unethical of me, given what I know now, to have children with a woman who was not eating RPD or thereabouts. I would not curse my offspring in that way. Especially given the genetic tendencies in my extended family. That would be child abuse.

[TylerDurden]

I think one can be too rigid re this issue. It would be better to go for a health-oriented partner as such a partner would be much more likely to accept minor compromises such as eating raw sushi or sashimi or steak tartare in public  or meats cooked only very very lightly etc.

[Paleo Donk]

I'm with you, man. It would be unethical of me, given what I know now, to have children with a woman who was not eating RPD or thereabouts. I would not curse my offspring in that way. Especially given the genetic tendencies in my extended family. That would be child abuse.

Wait, unethical? child abuse? Don't you think you are taking this a bit too far? We were all born into familites eating cooked foods and large amounts of sweets and although we have suffered for quite some time, we have found a path to give us great health. Most of us are in very good health and would have probably been in excellent health if we were nourished since birth as we are now. Now we have an enormous advantage! We can start teaching our kids from the beginning to adpot a healthier diet and in turn they will teach their kids and so on.  

I remember you attempting to make a bet not too long ago about someone's son whether or not they would be a genius with a certain IQ if they stayed raw paleo. I think this kids mother was not raw paleo either. So, even if you are willing to bet that you could father a genius son with probably better than average looks and athleticism too you wouldn't want to procreate with someone that isnt on rpd? Why stop at a recent convert to rpd? You can still go to the arctic and find an inuit woman who has 100's of generations of rpd under her belt and concieve a child with her.

Like you said the odds are with us regardless of whether the mother is rpd or not.

[TylerDurden]

Technically, the Inuit only eat some raw animal food(50%?) They also eat lots of cooked animal foods too. So, a better option would be to go to some RVAF diet commune/Primal Potluck etc.

[jessica]

Wait, unethical? child abuse? Don't you think you are taking this a bit too far? We were all born into familites eating cooked foods and large amounts of sweets and although we have suffered for quite some time, we have found a path to give us great health. Most of us are in very good health and would have probably been in excellent health if we were nourished since birth as we are now. Now we have an enormous advantage! We can start teaching our kids from the beginning to adpot a healthier diet and in turn they will teach their kids and so on. 

you kind of just made his point for him!
you have to remember that we are no different than any other animal in our desire to produce the most beautiful, substantial and healthiest offspring!  the rarity of quality mate's who are educated enough to raise children in ideal condition(proper diet and environment) may be a hindrance to raw paleo dieters but i find no fault in being picky in the search and reluctance to settle....but maybe i just made your point because the fault would be never having a relationship with someone who does not totally meat the criteria and then never having the opportunity to educate them, reproduce and then make wonderful healthful offspring...

[wodgina]

 

There is no real answer to 'how to tell your loved ones what you eat'. We've chosen health over fitting into society.

I still worry about people coming over my house and seeing whats in my fridge (not much) I went out with a girl for a short while who I knew just wouldn't understand my diet but I was really attracted to her so I filled my fridge with about $30 worth of junk! hmm I wasn't sure if we were going anywhere anyway so held back on bringing up the raw stuff.

[PaleoPhil]

Quote from: PaleoPhil on Yesterday at 09:44:40 PM
I'm with you, man. It would be unethical of me, given what I know now, to have children with a woman who was not eating RPD or thereabouts. I would not curse my offspring in that way. Especially given the genetic tendencies in my extended family. That would be child abuse.

....you wouldn't want to procreate with someone that isnt on rpd? Why stop at a recent convert to rpd? You can still go to the arctic and find an inuit woman who has 100's of generations of rpd under her belt and concieve a child with her.

Like you said the odds are with us regardless of whether the mother is rpd or not.

I thought I had covered that by writing "or thereabouts" and "given the genetic tendencies in my extended family." I don't think it is necessary to go to the extremes of procreating only "with a woman who has 100's of generations of rpd under her belt." For one thing, that would mean no procreation at all for most people.

Plus, as was pointed out, I don't have to find a woman who is already a RPDer. It could be a person who I persuaded to change her diet. I had a mate who wanted to have a child I could make clear that I would only have one if she ate mostly RPD and could explain why. Alternatively, we could decide to not have children.