Hi Inger - I would like to try BC. That was encouraging. Three cows at my CSA are going to calf any day now so it was a good time to learn this too. I don't know if they will save it for me, but I will ask. If not I will find it fresh/frozen from some where. Also, I like you too and I love to read your posts.
This is going to be long and nobody has to read it I was going to PM Dorthy, but some folks like a story, so every one is welcome to eat from this raw dark heart of my healing journey.
Hi Dorthy I REALLY APREICATE EVERYTHING YOU HAVE SHARED. Please don't stop. I find it all valuable. I know you're not my daughter and the story is different, but I do have a beautiful 15yr/o daughter. Before I became pregnant my grandfather died during an elective surgery to repair damage from a previous surgery on his mitral valve. He was 70 when they said he should have surgery. He was very functional, but they wanted to repair the defect before he had complications. He went like a lamb to the slaughter. He was such a smart, good man. He questioned and checked into everything in his life except his priest and his MD. My grandparents raised me and loosing him was like loosing my father. I was devastated and scared. I really didn't trust doctors and I had no insurance, so I didn't go to a doctor even when I was pregnant. I found a midwife and found I had diabetes. I was 7 months pregnant. I was in school to be a chiropractor and I was into alternative medicine then too. I ate a healthy whole foods diet while I was pregnant, no junk but, I ate "healthy cabs". I eliminated all carbs and was able to maintain normal BS. So, they decided to skip insulin. I was under a lot of stress though and Ivy was born 2 weeks later. She was 21/2 months premature and she was so, so sick. Every day she almost died from something, but 21/2 months later I took her home. She did very well at home and is strong now. I didn't watch what I ate at all while she was sick. They said diabetes would go away when I wasn't pregnant and I was consumed with my baby's sickness. I rechecked my BS around the time she came home and it was high, so I decide to eat healthy. I went to macrobiotic thinking it was great at the time. My BS were often not good. I tried many diets, prayer, chiropractic, energy medicine, crystals, supplements, I feel like I have done it all. Now I realise that my diet, no matter how perfect, is only a part. To reclaim my health I have to do EVERYTHING to be healthy -- Sleep, exercise, meditate, play, love and be loved, and stay in deep peace through EVERYTHING.
When Ivy was 2 I hit a wall I hadn't taken insulin, and I was sick. I couldn't tell whether I was awake or asleep. I would slap myself hard then cry because I still couldn't tell. I don't know exactly why it manifested that way, I ran a 24/7 race from the drinking fountain to the toilet. I peed my bed every night. I talked to god all of the time and I herd god's voice, It was beautiful, so full of love. It was honest and fun. The words were always few and simple, but the feelings evoked from the sound was packed with meaning and full of emotion. Sometimes it was female and sometimes male, but the presence of the other was always there, like if one parent was on the phone and the other was listening, you can feel the quiet one there. One day I was stuck in a hot concrete place and I looked around to find something pleasent to look at. I saw a sapling it had a beautiful blossom and I felt my love for this bit of nature that was allowed in that place. I thought the words, "how beautiful," and I heard, "yes, but you will not gaze on it long." I understood that she meant I would soon die, and is that what I wanted? There was no judgement, no fear, - love and safety came to me like a river. I didn't know, it seemed like I had no choice, but I heard choice in her voice. I don't remember any more words but, she stayed, infinite patience waiting for my answer. I thought for days of what would become of my little daughter with out me. There were people who would take her, but only I was right for her. She had fought for her life and I would fight for mine. The choice was made. The close presence of god receded to wherever and life went on.
I have been given many blessings and this was one. I believe I would not have herd god's voice the way I did if I weren't walking at the edge of death for months. I think the most logical explanation is that my electrolytes were so depleted from gallons of water that I hallucinated. The spiritual explanation is obvious, and I think it was both. I am glad I have diabetes, it is a blessing, I am who I am because of it. I wouldn't be the mother I am. Ivy wouldn't be exactly the wonderful woman she is. Holding diabetes has touched many. My love ones and I have suffered with it, but I have no regrets.
I was 26yrs/o, my skin hung from my bones, my belly was swollen, and my kidney's hurt badly so, I decided to go to the ER. I had fought taking insulin b/c I believed it would be the death of me. I lived but, I was forever changed, as it dripped into my veins, a part of me died so that another could live. I have never given up believing that I am meant to be free, eventually, but I am also meant to have diabetes for now.
RAVF have given me great hope that I still have a chance to completely come off of insulin. My body is dependant on insulin. I have only been eating from noon to 5pm and I am doing better since I've adjusted my insulin so that I take more around eating time and taper it off at night, taking the very least in the morning when I am active. To give an example of how dependent my body is. I went for a 2 hour walk today through the snow, up and down hills at a moderate pace. My BS just before walking was 163. I took 0.3 units so, that I would have some insulin on board. Insulin pumps let you take a tenth of what is possible with syringes. When I returned from the walk my BS was 244. I think it is because my body tried to metabolise fat for energy, but I didn't have insulin in my body to get it into my cells, so it sat in my blood and waited for me to put my pump back on. So, when you say to avoid foods that make my sugar go up. I think you don't understand how complicated it is. I ate nothing for 20hrs and had exercise and still had a BS of 244. I have had that happen when I eat 3 meals per day too. Honey was obvious, but I'm glad I tried. I feel good about the whole experience. What you said helped me. You validated my experience that honey isn't good for me, even though AV suggested it in a book that made lots of sense. You helped me to be comfortable with my experience which diverted from AV. I liked the way you did it to. Kind isn't always pretty. Please continue to share everything you want to. Sometimes even things that seem unrelated are the perfect thing.
I do understand the negative consequence of not taking care of BS. Every work day I see, blindness, amputations, and dialysis diabetic patients. I do want to live and heal. I am a self centered person. It keeps me alive. I'm 40, I've been sick for 15 years and I could out run my husband and daughter. I'm so proud of that. I want them to do well, but have worked for every bit of strength and stamina I have.
I am open minded and experimental. I have made a ton of mistakes, but I try to stay aware and to learn. I try to not go crazy or get depressed, when disease surrounds me and thrives within me. I have completely come off of insulin though fasting and I want to give the fast 5 plan a good go. So, far its not bad. I'm not burning many ketones, no unbearable cravings, and stable BS.
I stopped eating fruit in the past and I spilled high levels of ketones, so I'm not ready to stop them again. I need a plan and maybe a back up plan. The one I'm working on now is to get my body used to fasting for 19 hrs/day, and decrease portion sizes a little, then eat some starchy carbs like carrots, cabage, khorabi, celery root and see how my body responds to them. Then, wean down to 1/2 a piece of fruit/day -Then every other day then just a few bites when I feel "low, or have a craving". If I get that far with stability. Then, I want to expand fasting not sure how. I want advice on that. But, I'm thinking it will be spring by then.