its silly to me that fruititarians would think that being more close to nature is being on a non violent diet. when is nature non violent? only in the fairy tales men tell themselves when they fear the truth, that nature is violent, death is natural, hurt is natural, those are the other side of the coin to peace, life, joy........you cannot have one without the other. we only believe these things because we are incapable of dealing with this because we have been told to believe that truth and perfection, those things created in mans mind, are ideal, but these ideals are false, and nature only has balance.
i skimmed this post because its freezing out while i am typing this, but i have good faith in your healing aura because you seem to be open to admit what hasnt worked for you before and willing to find a better way to be