Author Topic: blood glucose, high fat, depression  (Read 17569 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline van

  • Mammoth Hunter
  • ******
  • Posts: 1,769
  • Gender: Male
    • View Profile
Re: blood glucose, high fat, depression
« Reply #25 on: March 07, 2013, 10:36:13 am »
Adora, that was truly kind of you, most generous to help in such detail.  I thank you

Offline eveheart

  • Mammoth Hunter
  • ******
  • Posts: 2,315
  • Gender: Female
    • View Profile
Re: blood glucose, high fat, depression
« Reply #26 on: March 07, 2013, 11:03:34 am »
Little Elefant, all I can say is Yes to what Adora said. Print her advice and read it often. Even true about fat, not skinny.

I had a tough time getting over the carb cravings on my way to very-low carb. I kept thinking that low carb must be bad for me because I couldn't get over the transition to fat burning. I finally made it by "munching" on fat whenever I had a carb craving. Now, I just keep it in my mind how badly carbs affect me, so I never go down the path of temptation. Some instinctos might say that restricting carbs is not instincto, but I say it is - if you know that you can't metabolize carbs properly, then you don't need to smell or taste them any more than you need to test rat poison.

My best wishes to you.
"I intend to live forever; so far, so good." -Steven Wright, comedian

Offline Inger

  • Chief
  • *****
  • Posts: 937
  • Gender: Female
  • 38 yo Norwegian RVAF s.-06, 90% carniv.
    • View Profile
Re: blood glucose, high fat, depression
« Reply #27 on: March 07, 2013, 02:35:39 pm »
Adora is an Angel. A beautiful angel with a beautiful heart.

Offline Iguana

  • Mammoth Hunter
  • ******
  • Posts: 3,049
  • Gender: Male
  • Eating tuna fish
    • View Profile
Re: blood glucose, high fat, depression
« Reply #28 on: March 07, 2013, 06:52:37 pm »
LittleElefant, I know you’re in a very difficult situation and I’m very sad about it.

Still, the choice is up to you. You leave your family free to eat whatever they want, so reciprocally you are free to eat the way you want. How could taking supplements, mixing, spicing and processing food make you more sociable and save time?

To be socially accepted, it generally suffice to tell people that we are doing a temporary experiment.

Aren’t you trying to rationalize a subconscious attraction for processed and cooked food? We all have this problem, which is rooted in the food our mother cooked for us when we were young and which we connected to her love. So, when we miss love and affection, which is most often the case, we are longing for food like the one our mother cooked or processed for us.

Love
F
Cause and effect are distant in time and space in complex systems, while at the same time there’s a tendency to look for causes near the events sought to be explained. Time delays in feedback in systems result in the condition where the long-run response of a system to an action is often different from its short-run response. — Ronald J. Ziegler

Offline cherimoya_kid

  • One who bans trolls
  • Mammoth Hunter
  • ******
  • Posts: 4,513
  • Gender: Male
    • View Profile
Re: blood glucose, high fat, depression
« Reply #29 on: March 07, 2013, 07:59:56 pm »
Hi Jessy



cerymoya kid,

it is sort of difficult to write down what I eat. It changes every day. Often I m very stressed while eating because I have no time, have to care for the kids or because I m with others who eat normal and it really stresses me out.
The last days when I made my diabetes diet I wrote everything down on the chronometer, I managed to eat approximately 2300 kcal per day, I ate 3 times a day, veggies, fish seaweed and some sort of fat, normally avocados or cocosnus, often I put everything in the blender, put a lot of spices inside, eat it with lettuce, some chucrute and apple cider vinegar. With it I take Magnesium Citrat, vit C, Msm, Chromium, vit B supplement, Vit D 3, sometimes GABA. Sometimes I cook green beans or spinach, that's the only cooked food I eat at the moment. Sometimes raw egg yolk but it seems to give me diaree. Sometimes I use coconut oil or olive oil, it gives a lot of calories without raising my blood sugar and that feels so  good specially in the evening.
Sometimes I make raw choclate or raw treats with fat and nuts but I usally overeat and feel supersick after it.
Generally I feel that even 2000 kcal for me are to much. I takes so much energy to digest and does not seems to make me gain weight
cherymoya kid, do you eat instinctive?

I eat mono-style, kind of a modified version of instinctive.  I eat only meat/fish/fat at lunch, and only fruit at dinner.  I eat just two meals a day.  I eat more fat than most instinctos do, mainly avocadoes and fatty fish.

I do think you should try to eat more mono-style. Even if you blend your food beforehand, you should try to eat it mostly mono-style. that doesn't mean you can't mix things up, but blending 5 or 6 things into one smoothie is not a good idea to do do every day.

I agree with Adora that you should stop cheating, and maybe even consider taking insulin for a while.

Offline Iguana

  • Mammoth Hunter
  • ******
  • Posts: 3,049
  • Gender: Male
  • Eating tuna fish
    • View Profile
Re: blood glucose, high fat, depression
« Reply #30 on: March 07, 2013, 08:22:07 pm »
AFAIK, diabetes usually gets completely over with instincto, nothing to worry about anymore, no insulin to take. I personally met a case and there have been others.

Here is a witness (sorry, in French) : http://www.oocities.org/hotsprings/7627/Tdiabeteinsulino.html
Cause and effect are distant in time and space in complex systems, while at the same time there’s a tendency to look for causes near the events sought to be explained. Time delays in feedback in systems result in the condition where the long-run response of a system to an action is often different from its short-run response. — Ronald J. Ziegler

Offline jessica

  • Mammoth Hunter
  • ******
  • Posts: 2,049
  • Gender: Female
    • View Profile
Re: blood glucose, high fat, depression
« Reply #31 on: March 07, 2013, 11:19:12 pm »
it might be true some can heal on instincto iguana, but sometimes people are so depleted they have no grasp of their own insticts, i am not sure if you have ever been so down and unhealthy as to consider suicide, but at that point death IS instinctual, its a very horrible place to be but like in nature, when an animal is nearing death, sometimes the brain will try and do things to promote this, like when animals are sick they stop eating completely, as that is much easier the to try and heal.  i have been their many times in my life, luckily i KNEW the origin of my suffering was not truly mental, it was not because i hated life, it was because i was unable to make myself feel well enough to start spiraling out of my depressed mental and depleted physical state.  and sometimes that knowing is not enough, when people get sick physically and it effects them mentally it is one of the hardest places to try to self heal from!  this is when one needs a community at their bedside.

in this case its not a sign of weakness to not be able to heal ones self.  its a sign of strength to ask for help and accept it

i do agree with what adora says and am glad she has experience with insulin to give advice.  i dont think it should be look down upon for lilEle to use all of the beneficial tools at her disposal if that means to cut the time of her suffering and to help her get back into balance so she can proceed from a better level. 
« Last Edit: March 07, 2013, 11:38:52 pm by jessica »

Offline Adora

  • Chief
  • *****
  • Posts: 509
  • Gender: Female
  • to thine own self be true ... Shakespeare
    • View Profile
Re: blood glucose, high fat, depression
« Reply #32 on: March 08, 2013, 08:46:57 am »
How do you ferment your fish? I haven't had good luck with making high fish, but I'd really like to try it.
know thyself and all of the mysteries of the gods and the universe will be revealed.
Oracle at Delphi

Then began I to thrive, and wisdom to get,
I grew and well I was;
Each word led me on to another word,
Each deed to another deed.
Odin, who chose to be weak and hang form the tree of the world (the universe), to capture the Runes (wisdom), so he (omnipotent) grew...
Each true word and deed leads to my manifestation of the true me.

Offline Iguana

  • Mammoth Hunter
  • ******
  • Posts: 3,049
  • Gender: Male
  • Eating tuna fish
    • View Profile
Re: blood glucose, high fat, depression
« Reply #33 on: March 11, 2013, 03:49:44 am »
it might be true some can heal on instincto iguana, but sometimes people are so depleted they have no grasp of their own insticts, i am not sure if you have ever been so down and unhealthy as to consider suicide, but at that point death IS instinctual,

Yes, I actually not only considered suicide but I committed suicide and almost died. I was 18 years old, was loving a girl who didn’t love me, unwilling to be more than a friend. I woke up a few seconds in a hospital with several medics in white clothes surrounding my bed and I quickly fell into coma again.

There I saw the bright light which is described in classical NDEs (as first reported in E. Kübler-Ross’s and R. Moody’s books). In this light, I felt there were very kind and knowledgeable souls (sort of divine beings or angels) who somehow told me to go back to my life and not do that again. Therefore, when I woke up next, I promised to my parents and to myself that I’ll never do it again. It’s too selfish, we are morally not allowed to do that (there must be exceptions in some special cases, I think).

5 years ago, I was in a similar situation with a married friend. She loved me too but the situation has been impossible in the current silly social pattern. I’ve been so sad that I wished I would die. But suicide was out of question, even if I was often thinking about it anyway.

Of course there’s a vicious circle when we are depressed: we eat badly which makes us feel unwell, which in turn makes us even more depressed. It’s very difficult or impossible to get out of this vicious circle without external help, love being the most efficient help – if not the only effective one.

Thanatos, the death drive, is in opposition with Eros, the impulse of love.
« Last Edit: March 11, 2013, 04:12:49 am by Iguana »
Cause and effect are distant in time and space in complex systems, while at the same time there’s a tendency to look for causes near the events sought to be explained. Time delays in feedback in systems result in the condition where the long-run response of a system to an action is often different from its short-run response. — Ronald J. Ziegler

Offline cherimoya_kid

  • One who bans trolls
  • Mammoth Hunter
  • ******
  • Posts: 4,513
  • Gender: Male
    • View Profile
Re: blood glucose, high fat, depression
« Reply #34 on: March 11, 2013, 10:39:11 am »
How do you ferment your fish? I haven't had good luck with making high fish, but I'd really like to try it.

I put mine in a glass container in the fridge, with a fairly tight-fitting lid.  The container is much larger than the fish, so there's plenty of oxygen in there.  I air it out at least once a day.

Offline Iguana

  • Mammoth Hunter
  • ******
  • Posts: 3,049
  • Gender: Male
  • Eating tuna fish
    • View Profile
Re: blood glucose, high fat, depression
« Reply #35 on: March 11, 2013, 04:24:41 pm »
I eat mono-style, kind of a modified version of instinctive.  I eat only meat/fish/fat at lunch, and only fruit at dinner.  I eat just two meals a day.  I eat more fat than most instinctos do, mainly avocadoes and fatty fish.
Isn't the addition of dairy your most relevant modification? How many "instinctos" do you know? Are there many in USA?
Cause and effect are distant in time and space in complex systems, while at the same time there’s a tendency to look for causes near the events sought to be explained. Time delays in feedback in systems result in the condition where the long-run response of a system to an action is often different from its short-run response. — Ronald J. Ziegler

Offline TylerDurden

  • Global Moderator
  • Mammoth Hunter
  • *****
  • Posts: 17,016
  • Gender: Male
    • View Profile
    • Raw Paleolithic Diet
Re: blood glucose, high fat, depression
« Reply #36 on: March 11, 2013, 08:54:58 pm »
Isn't the addition of dairy your most relevant modification? How many "instinctos" do you know? Are there many in USA?
There was an offshoot of Instincto, called" Instinctive Nutrition" which grew in the USA in the 1970s or so, onwards. I believe this is the definitive book for the movement:-

http://worldofdiets.info/instinctive-nutrition/

There is also some american book by a guy called "Zephyr" I think?
"During the last campaign I knew what was happening. You know, they mocked me for my foreign policy and they laughed at my monetary policy. No more. No more.
" Ron Paul.

Offline Iguana

  • Mammoth Hunter
  • ******
  • Posts: 3,049
  • Gender: Male
  • Eating tuna fish
    • View Profile
Re: blood glucose, high fat, depression
« Reply #37 on: March 11, 2013, 11:25:35 pm »
Ah, I know the book of Severen Schaeffer, I did read at least some parts of it or perhaps even the whole long time ago. There's no difference with the instincto as defined by GCB except that S. Schaeffer perhaps simplified by omitting some parts. For example, he defined the instinctive stop by "taste change" only whereas it often happens in other ways.
From your link:
Quote
The author of the book also states that dairy products and cereal grains aren’t natural foods, as they entered the human diet just recently and haven’t let the human body to adapt to them.
Zephir was the guy in Hawaii who got trichinosis after having eaten the liver of a mongoose he probably caught while it escaped form a garbage can, as I previously wrote somewhere else on this forum. Yes, he wrote a book :
Instinctive Eating: The Lost Knowledge of Optimum Nutrition

« Last Edit: March 11, 2013, 11:34:26 pm by Iguana »
Cause and effect are distant in time and space in complex systems, while at the same time there’s a tendency to look for causes near the events sought to be explained. Time delays in feedback in systems result in the condition where the long-run response of a system to an action is often different from its short-run response. — Ronald J. Ziegler

Offline Adora

  • Chief
  • *****
  • Posts: 509
  • Gender: Female
  • to thine own self be true ... Shakespeare
    • View Profile
Re: blood glucose, high fat, depression
« Reply #38 on: March 12, 2013, 12:35:32 am »
Iguana - that was a good share. It helped me to realize I know nearly nothing, which I find liberating, once I am able to hold the terror and let it heal from my love and acceptance into excitement. Not that I presume that I knew you, but still a surprise  ;).

Cheri - you make high fish the same as any other meat? Mine tastes different. I'll try again. Once I've decided I'm not afraid of it, it changes, but that takes some experimenting.

ele- How are you doing? I slept out side on the ground atop a soft lamb skin, for some intense earthing. I'm going to go back out soon. It is warm today, last night 38deg Celsius, but I was warm in my flannel and wool. I have been so sure that doing this would have a profound effect, I've almost given it a magical expectation to heal me. Through the night I was anxious because I didn't feel much different. I've had the same thoughts about raw food, cold, dark, rest, etc. This morning I was almost depressed that my experience was not more profound. I know better, but weakness and desperation = irrational, desperate, hopes. The earth and fresh air did feel nice, the trees in the yard were lovely in the morning mist, the water fowl's calls provided distant music, the damp ground smelled of moss and spring, it was beautiful. I knew it, but I was blocked by this fear, "what if I don't posses what it takes to heal, what if it is beyond me, if I've missed the boat, I'm too far gone, too late, too weak...." The words waxed to silent screams, then waned to numbness.  They come from my devils, the cool elusive and the angry berating, I know they are in me, a part of me, maybe not me, but mine. I love them, I want them, they have commanded and controlled me. Recently, I realized they need me, they even want my love, or respond favorably to it. That was just enough to get past the block.  I lay there feeling my life force energy move quietly in my chest while my devils tapes played in my head. I waited for something to evolve. Nothing did, but I'm proud that I stayed with it.
    When I was first sick with diabetes, before I took insulin and I was wasting away without enough of my own insulin, I read a book called, The Dark Heart of Healing. It is a woman's account of how separate she felt as a sick woman in the world around her. The gem of that book was to love yourself. The human race as a whole is very poor at it. Some know how to entertain themselves, distract themselves, pleasure themselves (oh,la,la), but to feel love for ourselves, especially when we are weak, afraid, ugly, sick, is a rare treasure. I have been reaching to be that for years, and it is slow.
     It takes 8-10 years to become a skilled nurse in 1 aspect of nursing. How long then, will it take to become, unconsciously competent at loving myself with all of the facets of life's experiences? At least a nurse has veteran nurses to go to for advise.
   Depression is when I am blocking something I am afraid to feel. All distractions are temporary, feeling remains, feeling has been elusive, because mind is in the distraction habit. Also, powerful, feelings are often surrounded by shock. I mean, "what if I really don't have what it takes, what if I'll never be good enough?" All of these ideas came from the Healing to wholeness website, and I've done the work, but I want to give credit to them for the path.
    I have a success story. I had asthma since I was a teen, triggered with cold and exercise.  It seems to be gone. I felt for a long time that there was a phycological component, that triggered or held the physical form of bronchiole constriction and thick mucus secretion that occurs with an "attack." I rarely used an inhaler, but I would wheeze for hours and work to breathe, often going to sleep would reset me.
    I was meditating while walking in the cold and I decided to feel the constriction. To love it. The plan grew and I was holding and loving it. My love grew for it, for the wheezing part. I slowed my pace so that I could breathe, but would speed up again when I felt it pass, because I wanted to hold it, to stay with it as long as it was their. The energy that was so tight, began to move, to unfold and swirl. It was enjoying my attention, and I was enjoying it. Tears of joy streamed down my face in the cold wind. I really loved this energy, it was a beautiful part of me, that needed me. I had held it outside of my love and judged it as an enemy for so long. I realized how beautiful it was, and I promised I would always love it, then I felt into it and embodied it, I  felt how good it felt to be loved and desired exactly as I was, perfect as is. Then I embodied myself as my own spirit healer, and looked down at myself and the part of me that had been so inaptly named asthma attack I had to laugh, and I held all of me, and drew it together, one whole complete being. This practice is on the website and I have tried to heal my vision and other things. I have had success always, but only once, so far has it led to a physical manifestation of healing.
   I that was over a year ago, once I felt a little reminder and I was able to pay close attention, because of the relationship I have with that energy. I realized that the fear was that it would stay, that it would be permanent. To be ugly, sick, weak, is not that scary if it is temporary, the fear is of being stuck. Pregnancy, makes us fat (in a way), a flu makes us weak, for a time, not really scary. Energy is meant to move. To change and I am meant to be healthy. To self correct. Energy blocks may hold sickness with the energy, or sickness may develop form blocked/trapped/suppressed/hated energy. Is diabetes so different from asthma? One difference is I don't feel it in one place. It is through out my system. Another is that asthma did abate for a time without medication, and diabetes has only once, and that was many years ago. Could the root of it still be an energetic need to be felt and loved? Could holding it outside of love, even hating it be constraining the energies own desire to self correct? Ad much as I want to feel into it, I still tell myself I can't, I don't know how. Logically, it should be much the same as before, but I haven't dove in. So, I watch, and feel, and pray and trust that it will come.
  I haven't read the article you sent me yet. I think I'm a little afraid, I like not eating carbs, especially recently, since I'm not craving them constantly.
know thyself and all of the mysteries of the gods and the universe will be revealed.
Oracle at Delphi

Then began I to thrive, and wisdom to get,
I grew and well I was;
Each word led me on to another word,
Each deed to another deed.
Odin, who chose to be weak and hang form the tree of the world (the universe), to capture the Runes (wisdom), so he (omnipotent) grew...
Each true word and deed leads to my manifestation of the true me.

Offline Suiren

  • Elder
  • ****
  • Posts: 393
  • Gender: Female
  • (r)evolutionary mom
    • View Profile
Re: blood glucose, high fat, depression
« Reply #39 on: March 12, 2013, 05:08:36 am »
Hi little Elefant!

I think you have gotten some great advice, also as far as the insulin goes from Adora!

You know I also have a weight gain problem. But I managed to go from 45 to almost 50kg (I'm 165cm tall) (100-110 lbs at 5'5") recently, while not even eating a very high amount of calories.

Summer last year I was trying to eat high carb AND high fat. I consumed about 81% fat, up to 3700 calories. There were carbs in there, even though it seems unlikely given the high fat content, about 90-140 g at the time. I did NOT gain an ounce, I even lost some weight and my face looked weirdly gaunt...like I lost fat in my face.
I gave up counting calories and eating lots of carbs and fat because it was frustrating. I ate a very low amount of calories, drifted into ketosis (30-60 g of carbs a day, shared with a baby due to breastfeeding).
I lost a bit more weight, I was fatigued, started losing my hair, had horrible PMS, bad acne, I had heart palpitations, chest pain, my thyroid was acting up again (TSH - 5), I had inflammatory pains in my body, my liver enzymes were so high my doctor suggested hospitalization...did I forget anything? Well, I felt like falling apart a bit too.

I am the type of person that when things don't work out naturally, and my body does not sort itself out after about 3 months, I take things into my own hands. Which means I go pestering a bunch of doctors and I do a TON of research. I turn into a research machine  ;). It honestly is a bit stressful, and I have been told that by Iguana too. But I just feel that it would be even more stressful to watch myself falling apart. Not to mention I was having problems that were getting unbearable and painful.

So my research made me try a few things. I don't know if it is for you, and I don't mean to make actual recommendations, but I just want to share this and you can extract from it whatever you like and what makes the most sense to you.

1. Detox and regulating hormones. I chose (herbal) supplements for fast results and ease of use. And fast results I did get. All problems bettered within two weeks. My hair loss lessened a bit, my acne went from bad to mild acne, my skin turned very rosy, felt warm and I could feel blood rushing through it for the first two weeks. It got very soft...like it has not been this soft since I was 14, dry spots disappeared. My next period was MUCH better, almost normal. My liver and thyroid tests turned out a bit better. I put on a little weight (went to 47.5 kg) and my face started looking more "plump" again. It even feels like it..very odd actually (I first noticed my face getting more flabby after pregnancy, or my skin not being a plump in general, which I rad is due to pregnancy hormones, since your body wants you soft and stretchy for birth ;) and should subside..which it did not really do for me) To me it seemed that my body finally started depositing fat in some places, which I know you have a problem with too.

2. I then read that ketosis can cause problems in some people that have a history of certain illnesses/ problems. With my thyroid problem and being underweight while eating lots, I totally fit the description. I also had every single symptom.
I upped my (good) carbs slowly, and now eat between 140-170 g of carbs. That is when I saw more bettering too. Pretty much all my problems improved. My liver enzymes were almost normal, my thyroid went back to the *3.2 TSH I had been able to maintain on Paleo, my hair loss lessened again, it went back to almost normal...etc.
And most importantly, since I added some more carbs, made sure I eat enough calories without forcing myself (so having a general idea of what I need to eat, but making it tasty and readily available so I easily reach my goal), a variety of things I gained even more weight.

I think my problem was a combination of many things. I had changed my diet, but was still full of toxins from my prior lifestyle, and adding more toxins because my body was trying to detox fast after going Paleo, but not doing a good job (my guess).
To top it off I was unable to absorb and digest my food and calories. I assume I could have lacked calories and nutrients due to poor absorption.
I am have been prone to hormone related problems and autoimmune diseases. I think the diet that drastically differed from what my body knew, might have thrown it off even more. Hormones CAN be affected by diet. Hormones also can lead to a million other problems in your body. I read something that suggested that almost everyone has a (at least minor) hormone related problem. Our hormones really are connected to everything.
 
The way you describe your problems, it sounds like you have major problems absorbing, digesting etc. That is something that can't be caused by something like not working out enough, or not eating enough of [insert rpd foot]. I personally think you have a bigger problem, than just not eating a perfect diet or not maintaining a perfect lifestyle and exercise routine. So I would look further.

Work with doctors. They are not perfect (at all), but they have the tools to investigate further. You could get your intestines checked for example, to see if you have damage from a previous undetected Gluten issue (Celiac can also cause one to be malnourished).
I would assume that after getting a bunch of check ups, you will have more clarity, and in case something is found, at least you will know your "enemy" and can target the problem more specifically.

Nachwort: Das tut mir uebrigens sehr leid mit deinem Mann. Ich denke du machst gerade eine sehr schwere Zeit durch und es ist verstaendlich, dass der Stress da bestimmt auch ein Grund fuer deine Probleme ist.
Falls du Freunde und Familie hast dort, wuerde ich versuchen viel Zeit mit ihnen zu verbringen, viel zu unternehmen, leichte Aktivitaeten, vielleicht etwas hobbymaessiges, um einfach den Stress auch erstmal etwas wegzunehmen.
Fuer dein Problem gibt es sicher einen Grund und eine Loesung. Mann muss die Sache vielleicht nur einfach mal anders anpacken. Nicht nur auf eine Sache vertrauen, sondern alles versuchen. So wuerde ich es jedenfalls machen.
Es ist ganz wichtig fuer deinen Mann und deine Tochter, dass du wieder bei Kraeften bist. Selbstmordgedanken, wie alle depressiven Gedanken, sind erschreckend und quaelend, aber ich bin mir sicher diese sind nur eine "Begleiterscheinung" der Misere in der du gerade steckst, und werden auch ganz schnell verschwinden wenn die Dinge sich etwas bessern.
Ich selbst habe keine Selbstmordgedanken, aber seit meiner Schwangerschaft spielen meine Gedanken auch manchmal verrueckt. Das aussert sich am ehesten dadurch, dass ich staendig Angst habe meinem Sohn koennte etwas passieren und in meinem Kopf spielt sich dann etwas zuviel Kopfkino ab (was ich frueher nie hatte) und das macht es noch viel schlimmer. Ich bin sicher, dass es bei mir hormonell bedingt ist, denn es fing genau 2 wo. nach der Geburt an. Es ist jetzt viel besser und eventuelle Gedanken verwerfe ich gleich wieder. Jeder hat Sorgen und auch schreckliche Gedanken, nur geben wir ihnen normal nicht so viel Bedeutung.
Ich habe mir immer wieder gesagt, dass es totaler Quatsch ist was ich mir zusammen denke und es auf die Hormone geschoben. So hat es wenigstens etwas an Schrecken verloren. Ich hoffe du kannst die Selbstmordgedanken beiseite schieben und dich auf alles Gute und Schoene konzentrieren. Ich bin zur Erkenntnis gekommen, dass man als Mutter weniger fuer sich selbst lebt, als fuer sein Kind.
Bevor ich Mutter wurde und einen liebenden Ehemann hatte, liess mich meine Krankheitsgeschichte ziemlich kalt. Natuerlich wollte ich leben, aber mit dem Tod haette ich mich einfacher abgefunden. Als mein Sohn auf die Welt kam (und ich noch Probleme mit dem Krebs etc. hatte), fand ich den Gedanken daran, dass seine Mutter vielleicht sterben koennte, bevor er gross war, einfach schrecklich. Umso mehr habe ich deswegen beschlossen "das kann einfach nicht passieren, und damit basta"...
Was ich damit sagen will - trotze deinen Problemen, lach sie aus, spiele sie herunter, sei ueberlegen. Irgendwann glaubt man wirklich dran.
------

Sorry for the German everyone, but you all know, me has bad English and some things I can't express the same way in another language  l)
Nyd byþ nearu on breostan; weorþeþ hi þeah oft niþa bearnum
to helpe and to hæle gehwæþre, gif hi his hlystaþ æror.

 

SMF spam blocked by CleanTalk